It’s a typical day on the road, we’re in Philadelphia, I’m doing my typical road day routine in a very untypical and blessed job. We had a great sound checked today with Reba and Kelly Clarkson. We’ve eaten dinner and now I’m in the back of the bus catching up on tweets and emails when I happen upon one from a friend of mine in North Carolina, Philip Cox. Philip and I were in high school band together in the drum line. He works in a law office in Greensboro, where I grew up.
I remember it like it was yesterday, we would walk into the band room, the sound of cacophony, talking, banging, and utter chaos. And then there was the smell. Bernard Gordon had an office in the band room and he did 2 things there (other than general band stuff). He smoked cigarettes like a chimney and he practiced his golf swing. Back then, you could smoke darn near anywhere, including in school.
Mr Gordon was a shorter man with curly hair and a pot belly. He had a high pitched voice that reminded me of the reindeer “coach” in Rudolf the Red Nosed Reindeer.
We were a very small band in a fairly small school. My school was literally 400 yards up the street from our house, waaaay out in the country. It was tobacco fields, houses and this high school.
We weren’t very good, but then, we were the Southern Guilford High School band and we got the job done.
Anyway, I digress. There are pivotal moments in your life when someone says something to you, something that may change the course of your life. You never forget the words that are spoken, like God takes them and brands them into your head. In that moment, whoever is speaking may not think too much about what they are saying. To them it’s nothing earth shattering. But one day in high school band, a few simple words rocked my world.
We were talking about my future and Mr. Gordon suddenly said “You know, you could be one of the best drummers in the world if you want to.”
I’m not really sure what he said after that, because that phrase hit me like a stray tennis racket. I can’t remember an entire year of trigonometry, but decades later, I still remember Mr. Gordon saying those words. And in that moment, he literally changed my destiny.
Would I have pursued music if he hadn’t have said it? Perhaps. Maybe. But he convinced me that day that I could be the best in the world. I didn’t think that before. I knew that I was decent at the drums. But he spoke something into me that transformed my thinking.
I’m sure he never gave it a second thought. But I sure have. All the time. It has helped me keep going in rough times. I drew strength from that remark. Clung to it when I wanted to quit.
The words we speak to others can do many things. They can bring life, hope, and happiness. Or they can tear down, discourage, and damage. And we may not even know that we are doing either.
I’m convinced that when we stand before God, we’re really gonna be surprised how our words affected people. I know Mr. Gordon will find out what his meant to me. He may be surprised. I have so wanted over the past few years to reconnect with him and share with him my achievements and how he played a role in that. Endless facebook and Google searches however proved fruitless.
Philip Cox informed me that Bernard Gordon passed away last year. I had no idea. I want to dedicate this blog post to him and his memory. Thank you Bernard Gordon, from the bottom of my heart. Your words helped shape my future. I’ll never forget what you have done for me.
What words have people spoken to you that unbeknownst to them, have changed your life? I would love your thoughts and comments.




